When you find your trust has been broken by people you cared for would you ever trust them again? It took me sometime to finally put this in to words for I was never one who could model for trustworthiness. So here it is: my reflection on Trust and doubts.
Trusting again is never easy. Once trust has been broken within a relationship, it becomes a choice between trying again or let it all go. The years you’ve spent together sometimes doesn’t necessarily bring you closer, sometimes the years you’ve spent together make things too ordinary, familiar and sometimes familiarity coupled with routine and ordinary breeds boredom. It is often when boredom strikes that trusts are broken.
The question is: Will you choose to try again? And are you sure you want to try again? I have seen relationships torn by stories of betrayal and hampered by distrust. They tried going back together but trust once broken becomes a choice. There is no such thing as mending when it comes to trust. Trust is like a glass, once broken, mending it will not make it whole again. Trust becomes disposable once broken because a repaired trust would show crack and crack means it is fragile and it is just a matter of time before it breaks apart again.
Trust is different between the weak and the strong people. The weaker ones would attempt to repair, the strong hearted people can discard old broken trust and replace it with a new one. Easier said than done but it is the only way to go. I heard people say it is never easy to bring back my trust once broken. That is correct; it is not easy so why try bringing it back. Try to trust anew. Fully.
Half trust is never a solution to anything in a relationship. It is either you trust or do not trust at all, there is no halfway, no half-baked attempts, no gray area. Trust is something that you give fully, not cracked or mended. Half trust means half doubt. Doubt is a parasite. A sliver of doubt could make every effort crumble down. No matter what you do doubt consumes absolutely once you give in to it. So it’s either you trust fully or let go. All your efforts will be in vain once mixed with distrust. All things that your partner does will be taken with distrust even the most innocent ones and that could be very stressful for you both. It will destroy the stuff you began to rebuild and you will find yourself with nothing to go on, only hate. And hate goes nowhere.
So trust or let go. Those are your two choices. If you choose to hold on let go of your doubt. Start fresh, take a leap of faith that you have both learned from your mistakes and this time you will both get it right.